” said an app user who described herself as abstinent by choice.
This idea came up many times in my conversations with people who described sex and dating lives that had gone into a deep freeze.Anna, who graduated from college three years ago, told me that in school, she struggled to “read” people. “I never really learned how to meet people in real life,” she said.She then proceeded to tell me about a guy she knew slightly from college, whom she’d recently bumped into a few times.As a 27-year-old woman in Philadelphia put it: “I have insecurities that make fun bar flirtation very stressful. If it doesn’t work out, fine, but there’s never a Is he asking me to hang as a friend or as a date?feeling.” Other people said they liked the fact that on an app, their first exchanges with a prospective date could play out via text rather than in a face-to-face or phone conversation, which had more potential to be awkward. “This person is interested in me to some extent.” The problem is that the more Anna uses apps, the less she can imagine getting along without them.